The coach needs to communicate just as readily with the team as he does with the parents. Practice changes, schedules, trip details. As you plan the pre-season parenting meeting these are the things that parents should know:

• A schedule of all games and practices
• Contact information for coaches and team parents or instructions on how to use an online organizational website
• Team Picture Date
• Team or League Rules and Policies

Sports parents do not want to be surprised after the season has started. They want to know all the details up front. They want to know what to expect from the coach, what is expected of them, and what is expected of their kids. Consistent, clear communication is the only thing that will keep things running smoothly on the team. It is priority one for a team parent as he or she works with the coaches.

Your Team Parent

Some coaches swear that having a parent liaison is vital. Think about it; you’re basically the end-all, be-all of the team. A parent can start talking to you after practice about the upcoming holiday schedule and end up screaming at you because their kid isn’t getting enough playing time.

This is why you should assign one parent, preferably the parent of a kid who plays a lot, to be your point of contact. Any communication from parents needs to go through your liaison first.  He or she filters out the fluff and then sends the rest on to you.

Provide Parents with Tips to Contribute

Simply offering parents some tips and guidance can improve the attitude and morale of everyone involved.  Almost all parents truly want to help but they don’t usually know how.  By educating them you can divert their energy towards things that will be positive to your program. 

Stay Out of the Stands

We recommend that you stay out of the stands during the season. After all, plenty of parents will want to talk with you before or after games, but is this really where your attention needs to be?

Probably not. You need to be focusing on your players, not their parents. If you want to get to know your players’ parents, then summer and fall leagues are the best time to do it since those are generally looser and almost everyone has a chance to play.

No Talking on Game Days

You should establish a rule that parents are not allowed to speak with you about playing time or any issues on “game day”.  Those conversations must be scheduled for another day.  Emotions are too high during game time and these issues can be handled much more effectively at a different time.

So, make it a rule that you won’t talk with any parents before or after games unless it’s an emergency. And, it’s smart to bring this up in your initial parent meeting, as well as putting it in your handbook. Remind parents the reason for this: you’re there to help their children become better players.

Schedule A Private Meeting

If a parent comes to you and wants to start yelling on the field, absolutely insist they set up a private meeting with you the next day. It’s not good for the players, and the other parents, to witness an argument. So, take it off the field. Setting up a next-day meeting will also give you time to prepare.

Before you meet with that parent, spend some time thinking about why they might be upset. Is it their child’s playing time? Is there a conflict with another player? Coming up with various scenarios can help you see things from that parent’s point of view. It’s also a good idea if you can get someone else (like an assistant coach or Director of Coaching) to sit in on the meeting as well. This might help the parent be more objective, as well as providing you with another set of ears.

Handle Blowouts With Calm Steadiness

No matter how hard you work to prevent it, there are always going to be the inevitable irate or overzealous parents to handle. It just comes with the territory of being a coach. So how can you handle the big blowouts when they happen?

First, listen. Let the parent have their say and don’t interrupt them. When it’s your turn to speak, then explain your point of view slowly and clearly, and, keep your focus on their child. Don’t do comparisons between their child and another player. If the parent starts raising their voice, do not match their tone. Stay in a calm normal tone and try to keep avoid saying negative things  You may even want to offer to allow the parent to come to practice so they can see what is happening.  Besides, how can the parent have an opinion unless they have been to all the practices?

Here is the worst part let them spout off at the end of the meeting. Thank them for informing you of their concerns, even though you may biting your lip, and let them know you hear them. It could not hurt when the meeting is done to get some feedback. You always tell your players to take it from you so do no be a hypocrite. Getting sincerer feedback can be vital to handling these situations as they come up. If that sounds familiar it is probably because you have said it to your players many times.

Find Opportunities and Playing Time for the Second Team

If you’re in a situation where you are not able to get everyone playing time, then you need to find opportunities for everyone.  As a coach, you owe it to the players on the team to get opportunities. Find more JV games.  Play a 5th quarter with the second group.  Contact other coaches to arrange “2nd team” games.  Arrange scrimmages.

Some kids just need an opportunity and need confidence.  You’d be amazed how many players develop late and you never know who those kids will be. If you never play these kids you are taking away their opportunity.  If they bust their butts in practice, then you owe it to them to find them games!  Not enough coaches make the effort needed to get all their players plenty of experience.